I got my coffee...

We ran out of coffee this week. I know, ME, out of COFFEE??? Who would have thought? I had to make Folgers yesterday. It was so so sad, and taste awful! I bought me some coffee this afternoon. I'm sipping it now while writing this blog. Maybe I should start a coffee blog? Like peoples fashion blogs. I could taste different coffee and blog about whether it is worth the price or not. Hmmm idea...

Here's my afternoon coffee. It's the 8 o'clock brand, you can get it at Walmart and it's really good. It's smooth, not too strong, and just right for a afternoon with a book. I like my coffee a little stronger in the mornings, so I will have to play with the combo of beans to water. But it gets a 9.5 in my book!



John and I went to Boone this past weekend. There are plenty of pics of our trip up on Facebook. We went shopping, walking on the parkway, watched movies, and played Just Dance 2 with Noelle. We had a nice relaxing time :) Here are some new shoes I got at Lucky Penny! Wore them to Wal-Mart today, and I LOVE them!

Work...

John is working. I know he told me where, but I don't remember. All I know is he is back in NC and not here. I have been so blessed with a husband that I love so much. He is so good to me. I don't like it when he is gone. I'm lonely without him. I guess it's a good thing that I miss him so much when he's gone. I've been working the past few days, so at least I haven't had to sit at home w/o him for as long.

Work has been difficult lately. A lot of sad patients and families have been coming in and out of unit. We have had ethics meetings regarding some of the patients admitted. I also feel conflicted about these cases. A baby is considered viable when they are over 500grams and 24weeks. Duke saves 23week infants less than 500grams all the time, but should we? What are their outcomes? Sometimes they turn out fine, sometimes they are tortured with every test, procedure, and surgery we throw at them for survival. They don't usually survive without some sort of detrimental effects. As a Christian it is hard for me to know what to think sometimes. I don't believe in abortion, but if a 23weeker is born should we torture it to "make" it survive?

I don't mean to depress everyone, but these are the things that go through my mind all the time. I pray for guidance at work, and to be there for the families. It feels wrong a lot of the time. When is enough, enough? When do we keep going no matter what? I always hope God will show me the way if I am ever in that situation.

Can we really blame families for wanting to save their baby, no matter what? I mean it's THEIR baby. The baby they hoped for, prayed for, loved for however many months. I just hate to be the one in their poking, proding, and watching the baby suffer.

I wish John were home. He is good about bringing me back to God, listening with me, and praying for me/with me. It's different on the phone. I can't stay focused. I get distracted. Friday can't come soon enough...

I have a boring blog... ;)

I read blogs, family blogs mostly. I like hearing about peoples lives. It's like reading a continuous novel about a most interesting family. A lot of the blogs I read are former patients of our unit. They go through the most intense of times, spending MONTHS in the hospital, but they have the most positive out looks on life. Their blogs are full of love, happiness, anecdotes, stories, and every day mishaps. I am so blessed to have a boring blog. John and I are so blessed with health and everything we need. We haven't had the trauma of long hospital stays, or sick family members. We are blessed.

On a side note, if you ever find yourself in the hospital for extended or short stays, remember the medical team is there to help you. We aren't out to make your life miserable. We didn't put you in the hospital. We are making decisions based on what we believe is the most beneficial. I don't go to work every day thinking how can I not listen to what this family wants, how can I make their life worse. We are doing the best we can with the options we have. We make mistakes. We are human. How many mistakes do you make at work each day? Are you allowed to make mistakes, but we are not? I understand we have your life in our hands, we all understand. We all have bad days, our goal is not to ruin your life. Please be understanding and compassionate to the nurses and doctors who work long hours, staying late, lacking sleep, just to provide the best quality of care. Thanks for letting me get that out of my system.

Don't get me wrong, I love my job. I love my patients. I love their families. I want everyone to be aware that we are all human.


Tonight is date night with the husband. I have to find something new to wear, I have been so safe with my outfits, wearing the same ones over and over. Maybe I should try to copy some of Rochelle Van Sickel's blog outfits ;) http://rochelleapproved.tumblr.com/

I think I will buy John some flowers ;) hehe

Another year, another day

We had a great weekend. I worked Friday, but Friday night Natalie came over and we ate pizza, talked, and watched some office. John and I rang the New Year's in cuddling in bed! We stayed up late watching more Office and snacking. Saturday we got to sleep in before heading to Sal's restaurant to meet up with family. Brother John and Becky were heading back to Chicago the next morning, and we decided to have one last lunch together. It was good to spend time with them during Christmas, we don't get to see them enough. Later Saturday we went to Anitra's to eat a traditional New Year's day dinner. Let me just say, her cornbread is amazing. I would eat it for 3 meals a day.

Yesterday was another Memaw Sunday. Brittany brought her Wii and Janice brought Just Dance 2. We danced and played all afternoon. My knees are so sore. John told me it probably was a bad idea to dance holding a 30lb. baby. It was awesome, I want Just Dance now!

Oh and just a side note. I have had the most trouble with AT&T last year. Currently they won't let me get my mom off my plan. She started her own plan with Dad and Allyson, but they are making it soooo difficult to get her off mine and onto their own. I mean REALLY! I have told them when my contract is up, I'm switching to Verizon. I just don't understand why it has to be so complicated. Why are we charged for minutes, texting and such. Think about your land-line. You aren't charged for minutes there, long distance yes, but not just minutes. These companies are making sooo much money on something that costs them 0.001 cents. Ugggggghhhhh!

Oh and Noelle spent the night with us Saturday night, went to church and Memaw's with us. She is such a cutie and so well behaved. Love that girl!

I decided for this year instead of making a New Year's resolution. I would pick a word to live by for the year. My word is 'relationship'. I need to concentrate on my relationship with God. I am a Christian, but I don't have a daily communication with God. So throughout the year, I am going to work on this as well as my relationship with John. I love him so much, and want to show him this with everything I do.

What is your goal for the year?